We all seem to find love once or twice. We all seem to experience someone's death, to see babies born, to go to school, to work, and enjoy our friends and family. Life has a ton of bright moments, and a lot of times life has some of the darkest moments we could ever imagine...but that's what it is; life.
I don't think a lot of us really ever live to our fullest potential. To live to my fullest potential would not be locking myself into one place and experiencing the same thing day after day. I see living as traveling the world, meeting tons of new people, learning different languages, and trying different types of food. Just living it up.
Unfortunately, life really isn't all that we could ever imagine because we have to make a living for ourselves and our families in order to survive. Now while we all know this, we all seem to be surprised when life throws curve balls at us. I definitely am. I look at my life sometimes and wonder how I got here and what did I do wrong? While the list can go on and on for that, I also like to think that no matter what mistakes I have made and no matter what I could have done differently, I am a better and stronger person because of it. I truly believe this gets me through my roughest days.
Without all the chaos I have experienced in my life, self inflicted or not, I have absolutely been shaped and molded into a different and a better person because of it. I am constantly learning new ways to deal with things and learning how the world and how people work. It amazes me at how many lessons I have taken in just through trials alone. Something that makes me smile is knowing that even in my darkest moments and even when I want to shut everyone out, God never turns away from me. He is always right there watching over me.
As most of you know, life has been more difficult for me lately than it has ever been really. I've been through a couple rough patches in my life before, but I never thought divorce would be one of them. Yep, you read it right...divorce (for those of you who didn't already know). And although I will never get into the details of it especially on my blog, it's a very hard period in time to go through. But I absolutely believe that EVERYTHING happens for a reason. And I believe that my life is better off. I know a lot of people have looked at my situation and judged until they couldn't judge anymore, and although I would LOVE to just tell everyone my side of the story I won't. Because what good does that do? The same result in the end is divorce.
The toughest part in life is feeling like everyone is against you and feeling like nobody understands or cares. That everyone is just judging you and the mistakes that you have made. But I am starting to overcome that. If anyone wants to judge me and my situation without being in it, then it says a hell of a lot more about them than it does me. I can own up to my mistakes and I can live with them, especially with God's grace and forgiveness and I have stopped worrying how others think and feel about MY life. When it comes down to it, unless you're my family or my very best friend, MY life in no way affects you. Lets be honest...people are just nosey. And I'm not saying I'm not because I definitely like hearing my share of stories, but one thing this has taught me is to not judge. And I NEVER will. Judging someone isn't going to make anyone's situations better. And it's definitely not making you look good.
I'm not really sure how we turned off onto this entire subject here on my blog today, but I guess it's just time that I let things go...let them be what they are going to be. One of my favorite lines to live by is "It is what it is." Because it's so true. There are certain things in life NO ONE can control. And believe me, this is hard for me...ask my family and my best friend, I am a control freak. I like to have control. But I am letting that go...I have to or this will eat me up in a heartbeat.
I am choosing to live by the fact that I can't control some things, that I am an imperfect girl that God is still working on, and that I will make mistakes that will hurt me and others but I WILL LEARN FROM THEM and that's all I can really ask. I will be a better person because of the trials I go through, and that's extremely comforting.
Life is funny, isn't it?
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